I am on a roller coaster.
Just when I am starting to feel better all of a sudden it feels like I am at the peak of the roller coaster tracks ready to plunge down the deep incline again into a darker place.
The holidays are upon us with Thanksgiving a few days away. It’s going to be strange this year. It’s my second year of divorce heading into the holidays and this year I am going to be without my kids. I am also not going to be with any family to celebrate all that we have to be thankful for which makes it just a little bit harder to find gratitude. I miss my family.
I admit I am feeling lonely. Loneliness is a weird emotion because you can feel lonely even when you are with other people. It is an empty hollow kind of feeling where you feel like you are just going through the motions of life.
I am not good at being alone. But this is one thing about divorce that I have had to get used to. Sometimes I don’t have your kids and there are times when I am alone in an empty house. It is so quiet. The feeling of loneliness quickly creeps in.
I am trying to cope. I am trying to be ok with it all.
Today however. I found myself crying on the phone with my mom. The tears flowing out of me. There was not stopping them from falling. It will be ok she reassured me. You have your friends to be on Thanksgiving with and you can always go and see your Uncle.
But despite her efforts the feelings of aloneness wrapped around me and squeezed me tightly.
Tips for coping with loneliness during the holidays #mentalhealth #wellnessTweet
What can you do to address this feeling if you are having it?
Tips to Help You Cope with Loneliness
- Acknowledge and embrace the feeling-It is ok to feel lonely, it is normal . . .when it begins to bring you into total darkness though it is important to reach out for help.
- Get out and be active-Being active can give you a healthy dose of endorphins which is a natural mood booster and can help to bring you out of the funk.
- Plan one outing or something to do each day-it can be as simple as going out to get ingredients and then going home and baking cookies.
- Write in a journal-Write down all of the things that you are grateful for by creating a list of gratitude. Writing can be cathartic and can help you to release any feelings that you are having.
- Arrange to see friends-Good friends will help you by acknowledging the feelings that you are having but they will also remind you that they are there for you and that you are not really alone even though it can feel like that.
- Volunteer-Getting out to help others who are in need can help to lift you out of your funk.
- Spend time with your pet-Pets can help boost your mood because they provide unconditional love.
- Check-in with your therapist-Cognitive behavioral therapy can help you with your inner dialogue and self-talk.
During this Thanksgiving break I plan to spend Thanksgiving at a Friendsgiving surrounded by friends. I am planning to spend time walking my dog. I have plans to go for some runs and am trying to arrange running with friends so it doesn’t have to be alone. I am continuing with regular visits to my therapist to address the feelings of loneliness that tend to wash over me in waves.
Thanks for joining me on my journey friends. And wishing you all love and happiness this Thanksgiving.